


The Notebook

by LazuliAlekto



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Episode Ignis Verse 2, Eventual Smut, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rimming, soft and sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-11-09
Packaged: 2019-08-11 16:01:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16478612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LazuliAlekto/pseuds/LazuliAlekto
Summary: Ignis is hurt during a hunt, and with Noct's magic diminished with the loss of the crystal he's unable to heal him immediately.While Ignis lays prone in hospital, Noct takes up his friend's notebook not realising it contains far more than recipes.Noct finds himself discovering so much more about his longtime advisor and friend than he ever thought he would.And realises something about himself in the process.





	1. Chapter 1

 

The Notebook

 

  Complacency.

  That’s what flashes through Noct’s mind as he rushed to Ignis prone on the ground, breathing hard, eyes wide and trying to contain his own panic to hide it from his King.  He fails, dismally and it’s that more than anything that makes Noct’s heart stutter and leap into his throat.  Ignis doesn’t panic.  He’s always calm and composed, even under fire – especially under fire.

  Ignis, not twenty minutes ago, had turned to Noct, that slight smirk on his face, “it wouldn’t do to be complacent now, Noct.”

  And Noct, cocky idiot that he is, grinned at his long-time friend, saluting him carelessly as he threw his sword and warped down into the pit that contained the behemoth, Gladio scrambling down the bank, Prompto taking up a position from which to fire upon it easily.  Ignis had followed and Noct knew that he was rolling his eyes.

  And now, here they were.  The behemoth was dead, yes, but the cost…

  The cost was far too high as far as Noct was concerned.

  “I got you, Iggy, I got you,” he murmured, cradling Ignis as gently as he could.  He pleaded with Gladio silently, forcing down the bile rising in his throat.  Gladio nodded somber, phone already in his hand, calling for Aranea or anyone to bring in an airship to transport them.

  Noct has never felt more useless.  He can’t pull a potion out and heal Ignis.  The magic of the crystal is no longer available to him that way, it’s a miracle he can even warp still, but there’s very little else remaining of the magic he once possessed.  Ignis knows this, he can tell, shaky hand reaching up to catch Noct’s attention.

  “I will be alright, Noct,” Ignis panted, pain etched on his features.

  Noct knows he’s crying, he can’t stop the tears, he’s trembling as Ignis closes his eyes.  He can’t lose Ignis, not now, not ever.  It’s too reminiscent of how he’d found Ignis almost dead in Zegnautus Keep after wearing the Ring to save him.  He’d been able to reach out to the crystal then, but now…

  Now he has to do what he can to keep Ignis from bleeding out in his arms, and wait.

  And hope.

  Hope that the medical team in the city know what they are doing.  Hope that they can help Ignis.  Hope that he’ll get to hear Ignis scolding him, laughing with him again.  Ignis is fundamental to his life, he can’t imagine living without him by his side.

  Hours later he’s sitting by the bed that Ignis has been assigned, waiting for the hospital staff to wheel him in.  They’ve prepared him for what he’ll see, that he’s going to be hooked up to multiple machines to help him, he’ll be sedated and likely will be for the immediate future.  

  He’s not prepared for how it tears at his heart when he sees how pale and wan Ignis looks, somehow seeming smaller in the bed.  His six foot frame shrunken and vulnerable.  He approached the bed, taking Ignis’ hand in his own, careful of the drip feeding him painkillers and whatever else it is in the bags hanging from the stand next to him.  The constant beep of the monitor told him Ignis’ heart is beating, that he’s alive, but Noct can’t help sinking into the chair provided, broken sobs filling the otherwise silent room.

  

  Several hours, or maybe minutes, he can’t tell which, someone comes in with Ignis’ personal possessions in a plastic bag, his clothing too far gone to save.  Noct barely registers them come and then go, nodding blankly to whatever it was they said.

  Dawn broke over the horizon, painting Ignis’ room in muted tones of gold before Noct finally moved, stretching his back to try and remove the kinks from sitting in one position for so long.  It’s then that he spied the bag.

  Phone, keys, pen, , his glasses, his favourite daggers, the pendant he normally wears and a well-worn notebook.

  The sight of it almost breaks Noct all over again, remembering seeing Ignis writing in it only hours before, most likely noting something about the hunt they were about to undertake.  The hunt that almost took his life.

  Glancing at Ignis, he strokes his face, pushing his hair aside gently.  

  Then he reach for the bag.

  He pulled the notebook out, flicking through it, frowning as he saw that it looked more like a journal of some sort, peppered with the occasional recipe and artfully drawn pictures.  The little sketches took him by surprise.  He didn’t know Ignis could draw.  Halting his progress through the notebook, he smiled at the depiction of a flower, every detail carefully inked, an equally detailed description written below.

  Then he saw the heading on one of the pages.

  It was addressed to Noct himself, Ignis’ signature at the bottom.  Flicking through more pages, he found more of the same, some of the pages spotted with some liquid, blurring the tiny elegant script that is thoroughly Ignis, others crinkled as if he’d thought to tear them out and then changed his mind.

  “Gods, Speccy, did you write this to me?  Am I meant to read it, or…fuck…I don’t know if I should, if it’s private,” he murmured to the man on the bed.  “I’m sorry if I’m not meant to…” he said softly, turning to the first page.

  _To Noctis,_

_I fear…Gods, that ****that** **  should be the first thing I say, or rather write to you.  I do fear, I fear so many things.  I fear I will never see you again, that the crystal has taken you from me forever, that I will never see you become the King I know you can be.  I fear that my temerity has cost us the chance to save you.  I fear what Pryna showed me will come to fruition.   _

_There are so many things I wished to say before you left.  I wanted to apologise to you, to ask your forgiveness for taking the ring.  I know that you most likely know why I did it, but I hope you can forgive me for being so utterly selfish in my motives.  I…I saw the previous wearers when I put it on, I saw what they tried to bargain, how they justified themselves, so I am assuming you were shown something similar and I hope you understand.  And why I never said anything._

_Shame, propriety, duty, all of it crumbled in the face of what I was shown.  I couldn’t bear it.  I still cannot accept it, I ****won’t** **  accept it.  I was so angry that they would do that to you, that the Gods would lead you like a lamb to slaughter… _

_I am still so very furious about that.  I doubt that will ever leave me._

_I sit here in Altissia, a place I now despise for what it represents, quite frankly stewing in my own guilt.  Gladio and Prompto fuss over me, and now I am garnering a sense of the frustration you had with me over the constant hovering.  They mean well, but bloody hell…_

_I am so sorry._

_Know that I am paying for it now.  Levity, yes, even now, I attempt it.  Roll your eyes at me if you wish, I certainly am._

_Yet…I doubt I would have behaved any differently even had I known just how annoying it is to be coddled.  I never meant it to feel that way, I simply wished to…make things easier for you, take some of the burden from your shoulders, much as I did in wearing the ring._

_You should not have to face any of it alone.  It is so monumentally unfair, Noct.  You should not have to…Gods, I cannot even write the word._

_You may find it amusing to see how completely out of control I am right now.  Re-reading what I have written thus far, well, I am bloody rambling.  I am not even saying what I really want to say.  I am not sure I can, that would make it…real, perhaps.  Though, I already know it is.  Committing the actual words to paper seems to be beyond me, even now._

_And that is laughably asinine.  My actions in Altissia and Zegnautus, to me, scream it to the world.  I have exposed myself.  Ravus has even inferred as much, speaking of the ****purity** ** **** of my motives.  I do not see it that way, considering I feel it was selfish.  Gladio and Prompto say nothing of it, skirting around the topic as if I am too fragile to bring it up.  In a way I am.   _

_Enough of these morose meanderings through my thoughts._

_We will be ready for you, my King.  We shall ensure the world survives for you to save.  I will find a way to circumvent the fate decreed for you.  I swear this to you, Noct.  I will do anything I can to see you live.  Selfish motives aside, you deserve to live._

_Yours, Always_

_Ignis._

  Noct slumped in his seat, staring at the words on the paper, then glancing back to Ignis laying back, almost as pale as the sheets he rested on.

  “Oh, Ignis,” Noct lamented, reaching out to stroke Ignis’ cool cheek.  “I wish I understood what you were trying to tell me, I wish that I _had_  been shown why you did it, but they didn’t grant me that.”  He sucked in a deep breath, “but I will tell you now, and again when you wake up, you have nothing to feel guilty about, never.”  He leaned over the bed, pressing his forehead to Ignis’, “just please, please wake up for me.”

 

  Prompto found him at Ignis’ bedside, passed out from exhaustion, notebook securely held in his arms.  He struggled to sit up when his friend shook him awake, giving him a sad smile.

  “Dude, c’mon, you should rest, Iggy would be upset you’re still here.  You haven’t even changed.”

  Noct looked down at himself, grimacing at the blood that stained his clothing.  Ignis’ blood.  He ran a shaky hand through his hair, weakly attempting to stand.  His body ached, his head ached.  His heart ached.

  “Shit,” he whispered, glancing at where Ignis lay, so still.  “Can you bring me something to change into, I don’t want to leave him.”

  “Noct, I get that, I do, but you gotta look after yourself,” Prompto said, helping him steady himself.  “If he wakes up and finds you like this he’s gonna have a fit.”

  “When…” Noct mumbled.  “ _ _When__  he wakes up.”  Prompto blanched, Noct shaking his head, “sorry, I just…”

  “Noct, buddy, it’s ok, just come with me, get something to eat, drink, I’ll sort your clothes if you don’t wanna leave him.”

  Noct nodded, casting a last glance at Ignis, placing the notebook down and following Prompto out to the hallway.

  “Where’s Gladio?” he asked as Prompto sorted out something for him to eat, grabbing him a bottle of water.

  “He’s been here most of the night, but had to go sort some shit at the Citadel, said, he’ll be back later.”

  “Right, ok,” Noct said, distracted.

  “How…how is Iggy?”

  Noct sighed, “no change since they brought him in, he’s sedated to keep him still.”  He looked up at Prompto, tears threatening.  “He told me not to be complacent, and I went ahead anyway and now he’s…”

  “Noct, he’ll be ok, they’re giving him the best care they can,” Prompto tried to reassure him.

 

  Noct showered and changed into the clothes Prompto brought him, using the shower in Ignis’ room so he wouldn’t be far, then settled back at his bedside.

  He reached for the notebook again.

  _Noct,_

_I miss you…_

_You have been gone now for six months and I…I am not coping well.  Prompto and Gladio want me to slow down, take some time to accept that you are…not here, however I just can’t.  I need to make sure you will be alright when you come back, that the dawn won’t herald your loss._

_I have been meeting with everyone I can, travelling to see Ravus and avail myself of every piece of information I can.  Sania has begun intensive research regarding the starscourge, Vyv is reaching out to as many contacts as he can, even Dino is doing what he can to assist if you can believe it.  Cor, Monica and Dustin are assembling as many of the remaining Glaive and Guard  as they can .  Lestallum is becoming our main base of operations, a gathering place for refugees.  It is rather crowded, but the people are safe there._

_The nights grow longer, even the days are darker.  I fear it will not be long before daylight vanishes altogether.  Sania has helped us organise special greenhouses, powered by contraptions thought up by Cindy to ensure the crops get enough light to be successful._

_I…all this information seems so mundane in the face of what I wish I could say to you._

_I miss you so desperately._

_~~I lo~~ _

_Yours, Always_

_Ignis_

  Noct could feel just how helpless Ignis had felt, he was experiencing that same thing, unable to help as Ignis lay in his bed.  He’d been told about the years of darkness, but reading Ignis’ words, it brought it all into focus.  He grabbed Ignis’ hand and pressed it to his cheek, wishing that Ignis would show some sign of waking.

  Futile.  He knew that.  Ignis would be heavily sedated for at least another 24 hours, possibly longer, and even after that he would be kept quiet, drugged to hold the pain at bay in order to let him heal.

  _Dear Noctis,_

_I am afraid you will be severely disappointed with me.  I am intensely disgusted with myself.  I argued with Camelia today.  I travelled to Altissia and I surmise just being in the city soured my mood, the result being…well, suffice to say I berated her for not allowing you the courtesy of a private meeting with Lady Lunafreya, before the rite._

_It was wrong of me, I know, yet…I could not stop the words pouring from my mouth.  I felt all the worse after my unseemly display as she simply took my hand and tried to placate me.  Everyone seems to be doing that a great deal lately.  I am letting my pain and anger bleed out into everything I do._

_I need to find a way to find some peace.  To find a way to be close to you.  I…I feel I may crack completely if I don’t.  I need to be all here for you when you return, I need to find a way to change destiny.  I cannot do that as I am right now, I am unable to focus.  All I can think about…_

_You have been gone a year, Noct.  A year._

_~~I lo~~ ~~~~_

_Yours, Always_

_Ignis_

  Noct stared at the words, biting his lip as he re-read the last two entries, especially the words Ignis had started to write and then crossed out.  What had he wanted to say?  Sighing deeply, Noct continued to read.  

  He read about the darkening skies, the flow of refugees eventually slowing to a trickle, the discovery that the daemons were the corrupted souls of men, women and children lost.  Ignis lamented the fact he’d yet to find a way out of the fate the Gods had decreed for him.  Though Noct knew that he had eventually discovered a way, he ached for Ignis, realising that the water marks on the pages were caused by tears.

  Ignis had cried for him, had been so distressed at what he termed his failure he had broken down time and time again.

  He was at a point where Ignis was writing about seven years into the darkness when a particular entry caused him to stare at the words on the page.

   _My darling Noct,_

_I am abandoning all pretence, I cannot deny it to myself, nor anyone else should they ask.  I have spent far too long holding it back, too long hiding it from everyone, especially you.  I know there is no hope for…I have no hopes that it can go anywhere, I never have._

_I love you, Noctis._

_After writing those words I simply sat for several minutes, knowing how unlikely it is that you will ever read them, that you will never know.  Just as you shall never know that underneath I am not the composed man I seem.  I am a mass of contradictions and insecurities, I merely hide it better.  Just as I hide how I feel.  And I do feel, deeply._

_It frightens me so very much how much I feel, what I feel.  And I hate that I have always portrayed myself as stoic, calm, composed when truly I wish you had seen under that façade to who I am really._

_So, I say it here, I show it here because it is the only place that I can._

_I love you._

_Yours, Always and Ever_

_Ignis._

  Tears in his eyes, Noct traced his fingers over the words, over and over until he could almost recite the passage.  Clasping the notebook to his chest with one hand he reached for Ignis with the other, lacing their fingers together.  A bubble of morose laughter rose in his throat.  Ignis had loved him, did he still?  How did he himself feel about his life-long friend?

  He considered where he was, that he had hardly left Ignis since he’d been brought in, that it tore his heart to shreds thinking of trying to go on without him, the way his words had made him cry.  He had always known he cared about Ignis, but love, was that what he felt?  Possibly.  Probably.

  When had it started, how long had he felt this way?  Always, was the answer that came to mind.  And with it the realisation of why he had been so uncomfortable with the thought of marrying Luna.  He thought about how he felt about Gladio and Prompto.  He loved them too, but it was a brotherly love.  With Ignis…it had always been different with Ignis, he could see that now.

 

  Opening the notebook, he drank in Ignis’ words, so elegantly applied to the mundane paper, yet so treasured, a glimpse into Ignis’ complex mind and soul.  A man who portrayed calm on the outside, yet had obviously harboured a wild streak of recklessness.  Zegnautus had shown that clearly and now Noct knew why he had done it.  What the Gods and Old Kings and Queens had seen in him, why he had been granted the power to use the ring.

   _My dearest darling Noctis,_

_I am giddy, I can’t stop laughing with the absolute glee that runs through me._

_I found a way!_

_****I found a way!** **_

_You won’t die!  The God’s plans be damned, I found a way, my love.  You will live!  You will see the dawn, you will be able to do anything you wish!  I can hardly write for the excitement and relief of it all.  I will explain it all to you when you return to us…to me.  But, suffice to say now, the Ring is the key._

_I cannot seem to sit still, I am behaving like Prompto I am so excited by this.  You wouldn’t recognise me I am sure._

_Noct, I want to dance, I want to sing, I want to scream it to the heavens, yet I dare not in case the Gods find a way to thwart my efforts.  They have seemed so adamant that you must sacrifice yourself that I fear they may find a way to ensure that happens.  I pray that they are not that cruel, that they won ’t take this chance away from you.  And they won ’t take you from me still._

_I won’t let that happen, I just can’t let it happen._

_To know that I may succeed…Oh Noct, you cannot know just how deliriously happy that makes me feel._

_It is a bright spark of hope in the darkness that surrounds us._

_I wish I could share with you how wonderful this feels, though I know if you were here, I would disgrace myself in a most unseemly display.  One that I know is inappropriate, but still…_

_I need to collect myself before I tell Gladio and Prompto, they will not heed my words if they appear to come from such a strange being as I find myself to be right now.  I must calm down._

_I am laughing at myself, I hope you realise.  Mainly because, here I am, literally bouncing in my seat with happiness, pouring these words onto paper as if I am speaking to you, though shouting would be a better description for it, and the silliest part of it all is you’ll likely never read this._

_I wouldn’t dare show you, I know myself too well to ever entertain ****that** ** **** thought. _

_However, that aside, to tell you first…it felt right to do so._

_I love you Noctis_

_Always and Ever yours_

_Ignis_

  Noctis leaned back in the chair, hand smothering his grin, tears running down his cheeks, wishing he __had__  seen that version of Ignis.  He’d gotten to see a subdued version of it when he returned, stepping into to Takka’s old diner to be greeted by his friends.  Ignis had taken him aside with the smuggest smile on his face that he had ever seen, eyes bright and twinkling, barely suppressed glee radiating from him as he explained how they would give the Gods the middle finger and Noct would live.

He’d been so animated, so happy, the happiest he’d ever seen him, flush high on his cheeks as Noct gaped at him in shock and awe.

And that was a restrained version, the toned down view of just how excited Ignis was.

He looked at Ignis in the bed, so still, the gentle rise and fall of his breath.

Reading through the notebook he’d come to know the Ignis underneath his exterior.  A man with a rebellious, reckless streak a mile wide, wild fire that burned so damnably bright it would blind anyone who looked upon it.  Noct had seen little glimpses of it, but to see it in Ignis’ own words…breathtaking.

  Right then and there, Noctis swore to himself and to Ignis, he would see that side, coax it out of him, let it free.

__

  Ignis was no longer in his induced coma, but he was still heavily drugged, the difference apparent in the fact he now moved a little, stilted movements while he was prone, his hand would clasp as if searching for something and Noct would curl their fingers together, smiling as it settled Ignis and soothed the lines on his brow.

Early in the afternoon that Ignis emerged from the coma, Noct slid the familiar necklace from the bag of Ignis’ possession, carefully settling it around the neck where it belonged, adjusting it so it sat over his collarbone.

Ignis had sighed in his slumber, a small smile tugging at his lips, Noct unable to resist the urge to place a soft kiss to his cheek.

  There were not many pages left in the notebook and Noct devoured them all, hungry for more insight into the man who held his heart.  The entries had a much more jubilant tone now, Ignis writing how he could feel how close Noct was to returning, how everyone and everything was coming together in preparation.  He read how Cor and the Glaives infiltrated Insomnia, clearing paths to the Citadel.  He read how Ignis had helped Ravus come to terms with his guilt.  He read about how Cindy had managed to engineer ways to bring light and keep the daemons at bay until Noct could banish them forever.

He found the entry Ignis had written the night he returned, his relief and joy palpable.

_My darling Noctis,_

_You are back!_

_I had to restrain myself from gathering you in my arms and kissing you senseless.  I am sure you would have expired on the spot had I done so and that is something I certainly don’t want._

_Oh, but you look so wonderful._

_To hear your voice…it’s deeper than it was, more mature, the cadence of your tone thoroughly regal and commanding.  You take my breath away.  My poor heart has been fluttering in my chest so badly I thought it might behave like one of those ridiculous cartoons and push out from my chest at each thump._

_You are so very beautiful, even more so now that a certain confidence has settled about your shoulders.  You walk tall as your father wished._

_You have a beard!  And a touch of silver in your hair.  You were always lovely, but now…bloody hell, Noct, you are ****stunningly beautiful** ** ****.** ** And, shameful as it is to admit, even here, so arousing I find myself having to leave your orbit to gasp for breath outside as you laugh and joke with Prompto. _

_Oh, to hear you laugh.  You cannot know what a joy that is._

_That you ****can** **  laugh, in the face of what you think you have to face…I have not had the privacy to tell you that you no longer have to face your own death.  I will, soon, very soon as I cannot abide the thought of you struggling with that.  I just wished to let you have a moment with friends first. _

_You are watching me as I write, no doubt wondering what it is that I find so important that I must take the time to put it down, possibly thinking it is a plan or a recipe.  You’ll never know._

_You’ll never know because I am a coward and I cannot tell you._

_Only here can I confess, bare my heart and soul._

_I close this now, I go to speak with you, lift your burden._

_I love you desperately, completely_

_Yours Always and in all ways_

_Ignis._

  Noct smiled broadly as he read over the entry.  The way the words jumped off the page at him, Ignis’ normally so neat script wavering with his excitement and joy had his own heart tightening in his chest.  He remembered looking over at Ignis, seeing the little smile on his face as he wrote, now knowing the secret he had been keeping.

He remembered especially the way Ignis had asked for a moment, so politely, as always so unassuming and apologising for monopolising his time.  He remembered the way Ignis had been vibrating with excitement as he explained what he had discovered.  He remembered his own shock, he remembered gathering Ignis into his arms, laughing and shouting, telling Ignis how amazing he was and the blush that had stained his cheeks.

“I should have known you would find a way around it,” he’d whispered in Ignis’ ear.  “You clever, stubborn, reckless bastard.”

Ignis had chuckled and demurred, so obviously pleased with Noct’s reaction, grinning broadly as he tried to duck his head.

“It is only what anyone would do.”  

Noct had shaken his head at that, “ahh, no, you’ve always gone above and beyond for me, Speccy.”  He’d taken Ignis’ hand then, rubbing a finger over the scorch mark, Ignis blinking owlishly.  “I wouldn’t be where I am today without you, I’d have given up so many times.”

  It was one of Noct’s most pleasant memories.  The moment his oldest friend had told him he didn’t have to die.  And now he wished that Ignis had made his confession to him about how he felt at the same time.  Though Noct hadn’t known it then, he was confident he would have been thrilled to hear those word from Ignis’ lips.

  Looking back down at the notebook, he could see there were still a few entries.

  With a secret smile on his face he turned the page and began to read again.

_My darling Noct,_

_Dawn._

_Dawn and you._

_The most beautiful sights in all of Eos._

_Ardyn defeated, trapped within the Ring, dawn returned, Eos has a future.  A future you provided for all its people.  A future you will get to see._

_I admit to trepidation, utterly paralysed by fear as I waited to see if it really would work.  I am not afraid to admit that.  And that had it not worked you would have found me by your side in the afterlife, dragging you back.  I would have gleefully bent over and let the Gods kiss my arse and drag you back._

_But I don’t need to do that, though, they can still kiss my arse if they wish, I simply do not care for them.  My faith in the benevolence of Gods was shattered that day in Altissia._

_Oh Noct, you look so weary, yet triumphant.  Regal with a hint of that mischievous nature of yours.  Your smile, bloody hell, it’s brighter than the dawn.  Beautiful, utterly, totally beautiful.  I could wax poetic about it all day, now that we have a day to do so._

_I know not what we shall do from here on out, most likely rest for a few days, then begin the arduous task of repairing our world, yet none of that matters, not when I can look up and feast my eyes on the sight of you smiling, alive and happy._

_I want so badly to clasp you in my arms and never let you go, whisper in your ear, tell you of my complete devotion, my love for you._

_In this one thing, this one simple thing, I am a coward._

_Here is the only place I can confess, let the words speak the truth of how I feel be free._

_I love you Noct_

_Yours Always and Ever_

_Ignis_

  Under that entry was a sketch and Noct gaped in surprise.  Of all the little drawings throughout the notebook, this one was the most detailed.  It was of himself as he raised his face to the sun, soaking in its rays.  This was how he’d looked to Ignis, a hint of a smile, the set of his shoulders weary, hair falling back from his raised face.  It was so much more intimate than a photo.  He glanced at Ignis on the hospital bed, looking more like himself than he had in days, Noct’s chest tightening.  He looked almost peaceful, like the few moments he’d ever seen him asleep, the lines no longer furrowed on his brow, his lips slack, not pursed in annoyance.  His hair hadn’t been styled in days and Noct likes it like this, sweeping across his forehead, the soft strands flicking a little from the stir of air coming through the crack of the open window.

  Noct let the notebook fall to his lap, reaching out like he had so many times recently to grip Ignis’ hand, running his thumb over the back of Ignis’ knuckles.  Unlike the rest of Ignis’ body there are so few scars, a product of his habit of wearing gloves.  They show signs of wear however.  An old burn on the back of his hand, Noct remembered when Ignis had got it.

  He’d been retrieving something from the oven, pulling back sharply when Noct came skittering to a stop beside him, flourishing his final results.  Ignis had hardly even hissed in pain as his hand brushed the searing hot side of the oven, calmly placing the dish on the counter, then running his hand under the cold tap as he congratulated Noct.  He’d applied a salve to his skin then pulled Noct into a hug and announced he would prepare something special for dessert.  His smile had been so fond, so proud as he’d listened to Noct chatter excitedly.

  One of many memories.

  So, so many of Noct’s memories include Ignis, particularly his earliest ones.  He’s figured in Noct’s life for so long he can’t really remember a time when Ignis wasn’t there.  He doesn’t want to think about a time when Ignis might not be there to share it all.

  And now, now he wants to share so much more with Ignis.

  Setting the notebook on the bed beside Ignis, Noct read through the last pages, smiling at a new recipe coupled with a drawing of a plant, presumably a herb, then he found the last entry.  Written the morning of the hunt.  

  _My dearest Noctis,_

_Oh my darling King, I do so wish you wouldn’t continue to put yourself in harms way doing these hunts, but then you wouldn’t be the man I adore so if you didn’t.  It’s all part and parcel of who you are.  A king who leads by example and not by rote.  And such a wonderful king you are, just as I knew you would always be._

_Watching you lead, watching you rule, it’s such a pleasure to be by your side.  To be your Hand._

_I never expected that, you know.  I was content to merely advise as I have always done, I should have known you would do it though.  It’s inherently you to do such a thing, much like this bloody hunt._

_Whoever heard of a king leaving his throne to take down a lumbering behemoth?  But then, whoever heard of a prince scrambling around chasing bloody frogs all because someone asked him to?  Though Sania did tend to demand rather than ask.  I still recall the look of incredulity on her face when she was told who you really were.  She really did think you were an actor!  So amusing.  The only acting I ever recall you doing was acting like a brat.  Not that you ever truly were one, I saw under the farce of it._

_Because I see you Noct, the real you, the you that you try so desperately to hide.  I see you in everything you do, the way you are so kind, so giving of your time.  Gentle, caring, intelligent, and now wise.  Fair and forgiving.  I see you, faults and all._

_And I love every part of you.  I love everything that you are, that you could be._

_I am more proud than I can possibly express that I get to see it, see you, be beside you for it all._

_I love you, Noctis_

_Yours Always_

_Ignis_

  Noct closed the notebook and placed it with Ignis’ other things, settling back in his seat and fixing his gaze on the man in the bed.  Prompto popped his head around the door, dragging Gladio with him.

  “Hey, how is he?” Gladio asked quietly.

  Noct glanced back at them, then turned back to Ignis, “He’s waking up by degrees.  The doctor said he should be properly awake soon.  They’ve dialed back the drugs that were keeping him under and his wounds are healing well.  They seem to think he’ll make a full recovery.”

  Prompto laid his hand on Noct’s shoulder, “that’s awesome.”

  Noct offered him a smile, “yeah, it is.”

  “So how long do you think they’ll be able to keep him here once he wakes up?”  Gladio seated himself at the end of Ignis’ bed.

  Noct chuckled, “not long if he has anything to say about it.  You know what he’s like,” Noct said affectionately.  “He’ll fuss over everyone else, but will never admit he’s not up to par.”

  “Totally Iggy,” Prompto laughed.  “He’s the world’s worst patient.”

  “Yeah, he is,” Noct grinned, holding Ignis’ hand in his tightly.  He looked at the other two, “we have to make sure he rests.”

  “We can try, not sure how well that’ll work though,” Gladio grumbled.  Amber eyes glanced down to where Noct had Ignis’ hand in his, flicking his gaze to Prompto.  “He’ll rest if you tell him to, Noct.”

  “Yeah, you could make it an order or decree or whatever,” Prompto chimed in, grinning at Gladio.

  Noct rolled his eyes, “I’ve never done that to him, not about to start now.”  He flushed a little, “and I don’t want to.”

  Gladio hummed from his spot at the end of the bed, “why’s that?”

  Noct ducked his head, not wanting to reveal how much things had changed for him over the last few days, “I just don’t.”

  Ignis shifted in the bed, halting all conversation.  The three men held their breath, watching him closely, relaxing after a moment when it became obvious that Ignis was still under.

  Noct stroked his hand, smiling as Ignis squeezed back.

 

  Noct strode into Ignis’ room to find some of the paraphernalia around him had been taken away.  He’d only been gone long enough to shower and change again, grabbing something to eat on the way.

  Sitting on the edge of the bed, he took Ignis hand again, smiling at how natural it felt now.

  Ignis stirred, turning his face on the pillow.

  “Noct,” Ignis muttered, voice rasping from disuse.

  “I’m here, Speccy,” Noct answered softly.  “You’re ok, you’re in hospital, everything will be alright, just stay still, please.”

  “Mmhmm,” Ignis hummed groggily.  “Are you..alright?”

  Noct barked out a half sob, half laugh.  It was so like Ignis.

  “I’m ok, Iggy, I promise.”

  Ignis hummed again, cracking one green eye open to assess that for himself, lips quirking into a small smile as he spotted Noct.  Seeing Ignis awake and at least semi-conscious was like a balm.  He quietly told Ignis what had happened, assuring him he was healing well, grinning when Ignis huffed about having to stay put for now.

  He stroked Ignis hair out of his sleepy eyes, cupping his cheek, watching the slight flush that stained his cheeks giving him a more healthy pallor.

  “Just rest, ok,” Noct whispered, pressing a kiss to Ignis’ forehead.  “I’ll be here when you wake up again.”

  Ignis made a soft little noise, fingers tightening around Noct’s.

  As Ignis drifted off again, Noct bit his lip.  He hadn’t even thought about doing it, but it was another thing that felt natural.  Ignis had no idea how he felt, that Noct loved him.  He had to find a way to tell him.  He pondered that for a few minutes as he watched Ignis sleep, able to see the difference in the stillness now that Ignis was no longer as heavily drugged.  He looked at the notebook, then back to Ignis, extracting his hand gently.

  He grasped hold of the notebook and picked up Ignis’ pen and before he lost his nerve he turned to the next blank page.

_Ignis_

_Wonderful, caring, sweet, Ignis._

_Please don’t be angry or upset that I read through this book, I just couldn’t stop once I started._

_And it showed me so much about you, things I am so happy to know.  It’s like it’s brought me closer to you and that…it’s been a comfort as I sat here with you._

_I am so sorry I didn’t listen to you.  I can’t promise that I won’t do something like that ever again, we both know me too well for me to do that, but I will try to make sure I never put you in danger like that again.  Yeah, I know, it’s your job, your duty, but I also know that it’s so much more than that._

_When you find this, please, please, come and tell me, talk to me.  I won’t order you to, I would never do that, especially about this, but we really need to talk.  And don’t be embarrassed, I truly am honoured you feel the way you do._

_Seeing you lying here, reading your words…I have come to realise a few things, things you need to hear, things I need to say._

_Always_

_Noct._

It took a few weeks before Ignis was back to some semblance of normalcy, fretting as he was wont to do about what was happening at the Citadel.  Noct relented and let him look over some paperwork, grinning when Ignis tutted over the state of affairs.

  He tried to keep a level head about the fact Ignis hadn’t approached him yet.  He knew Ignis didn’t write in the notebook consistently, only when he seemed to have a need to put his thoughts down.  So he tried to be patient.  But he couldn’t hold back the way he felt.  It bled out in the way he acted around Ignis, feeling like a teenager with his first crush, which in some ways he was.  He couldn’t stop the little gestures of affection, taking Ignis’ hand when he was fretting, smiling at him, sitting close and letting his gaze linger.

  Ignis reacted with a confused expression, a little flush gracing his cheekbones, averting his eyes, pushing his glasses up his nose in a gesture Noct recognised as a nervous habit.

  Late one evening, a tentative knock sounded at his door, Ignis entering a moment later.

  In his hands, knuckles white, was the notebook.

  Noct beamed at him, waving him over, patting the couch next to him.

  Ignis bit his lip, a new gesture, but one that tugged at Noct’s heart.  He could see how nervous Ignis was as he came closer, his steps faltering, head down.

  “Ignis, it’s ok,” Noct tried to reassure him.

  Ignis looked up sharply, “Noct…I…”

  Noct tugged him down, keeping hold of the hand that wasn’t holding the notebook.  He touched it gently, “this…I had no idea how you felt, how you feel…you were so good at hiding it.”

  “I…I never…” Ignis stuttered, cheeks pink.

  “I know,” Noct whispered.  “You’re not mad I read it?”

  “No…not exactly, I am…mortified that…” Ignis faltered.

  “Don’t be, please.  I meant what I said, that I am honoured.”  He stroked Ignis’ hand.  “You are the most amazing man I know.”

  Ignis whined in distress, “Noct.”

  “Please, let me say this, Speccy,” Noct pleaded with him.  Ignis nodded, worrying at his lip again.  “When I saw you lying in that bed, so still…I…I felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest, I realised how important you are to me, how you’ve always been there, had my back, supported me.”  He took a deep breath, keeping his eyes locked with Ignis’.  “How I would never be who I am without you, how I can’t be without you.  I realised how it’s always been you.  That I love you too.”

  Ignis drew in a sharp breath, confused and panicked.

  “You jest, surely you jest,” Ignis hissed, pulling away.  Noct shook his head in denial, but Ignis was convinced it was all a twisted joke.  “How could _you_  possibly love me?”  He laughed brokenly and Noct’s heart felt like it would shatter into thousands of pieces.

  “I wouldn’t joke about this, Ignis,” Noct asserted gently, taking hold of Ignis’ shoulders and making him look up.  Ignis was pale, green eyes wide behind his glasses, fingers tracing circles over the cover of the notebook.  “I mean every word,” he added.  “Do you need me to prove it?”

  Ignis blinked, unable to process what Noct was saying.  He nodded slowly, wary.

  Noct leaned forward, hands still firmly attatched to Ignis’ shoulders.  Ignis stiffened when their lips met, gasping in shock.  Noct leaned into the kiss, trying to express everything he felt.  Ignis’ hands dropped the notebook, letting it slide to the floor, unheard and unnoticed as he set his hands on Noct’s waist, eyes fluttering shut as he gave in to the kiss, his lips moving faintly against Noct’s.  Noct smiled against Ignis’ mouth, closing his own eyes, shuffling closer as the kiss morphed into something deeper, less chaste.

  Noct’s gasp of shock swallowed as Ignis took control, pushing Noct back, clambering over him and swiping his tongue over Noct’s lips.  Noct opened his mouth, allowing Ignis entry, tangling their tongues together, urging Ignis into laying over him properly so he could feel the comforting weight of him.  

  This was the Ignis he’d read about, the Ignis he’d wanted to see for himself, feel for himself.

  In reality, it was so much better than anything he imagined.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

    

  When Noct opened his eyes after Ignis eventually pulled their mouths apart, he was met with the sight of Ignis dazed, his eyes glassy, lips swollen and red from their kiss, chest heaving with his breaths, expression slightly bewildered.

  Noct chased his mouth, pulling Ignis back down again, letting his thighs drop open for Ignis to settle between them.

  Ignis stole his breath, nibbling at his jaw, “Noctis,” his hushed voice reverent.

  “Do you believe me now?” Noct asked quietly.

  “No,” Ignis laughed.  “I think I must be dreaming.”

  “You’re really not, Iggy,” Noct said, punctuating it with a nip to his lip.

  Ignis giggled.  The sound was one so rare that Noct could count on one hand how many times he’d heard it since Ignis grew up.  When they were children, it had been fairly common to hear the high pitched giggle, but the moment Ignis realised what his position was to be, the sound had faded.  Noct would hear Ignis chuckle when amused, sometimes laugh, but the giggle, an unadulterated sound of pure joy - that was rare in the extreme.

  To hear it now, Noct’s heart soared.

  It meant Ignis’ walls were down, that he felt free with Noct, that he was happy.  Ignis’ eyes twinkle, bright like emeralds in the sun, dark, thick lashes sweeping down to cover them as he sucks in a breath, his lips curling into a smile he just can’t hide.  

“Noct,” Ignis whispered, fingers trailing over Noct’s cheek and jaw, his touch featherlight, hesitant.  Noct is fairly sure Ignis is still trying to process everything.  He seems afraid to touch, afraid to speak in case the dream fades and he’s left with nothing.

  Noct is going to change that.  He wants to give Ignis everything he’s ever dreamed of and more.

  “Do you believe me now?”

  Ignis snorted, lowering his head to Noct’s chest, “perhaps.”  He tilted his head up again, lip caught between his teeth, eyes lowered demurely.  “May I kiss you again?”  The question is shy, and totally endearing.

  Noct grinned, looping his hands around Ignis’ neck, “you can kiss me as many times as you want.”

  “Nrrgh,” Ignis whined uncomprehendingly.

  “Aww, did I break you, Baby?” Noct teased.

  Ignis blinked, the pink over his cheekbones deepening to a deep crimson.  “I hate you,” he hissed.

  Noct threw back his head and laughed, “you really don’t.”  Ignis scowled and Noct simply pulled him closer, planting a kiss to the bump on his nose affectionately.  

  “No, I don’t,” Ignis conceded softly, rubbing his nose along Noct’s.  “I adore you.”  A kiss landed on Noct’s cheek.  “I am infatuated with you.”  Another kiss to his other cheek.  “I love you.”  With those words Ignis slotted their mouths together, pressing his chest to Noct’s.  Noct groaned into the kiss, hooking his ankles behind Ignis’ back.  It was one thing to read that Ignis loved him, but completely another to hear it from his lips, his voice husky, reverent.

  Ignis parted his lips, flicking the tip of his tongue out to glide over Noct’s bottom lip coaxing him to open his own mouth and let their tongues dance together.  When Noct does so, Ignis groaned deep in his throat, a rumble Noct felt in his chest, pressed flush as they were.  Ignis leaned on his elbows, tangling his fingers in Noct’s hair, deepening the kiss, delving his tongue right into Noct’s mouth, possessive and overwhelming.

  Who knew Ignis could kiss like this?

  It’s all encompassing, unrelenting and thoroughly Ignis.

  Noct was lost in it, completely unaware of how long they were entwined that way, Ignis’ breath hot on his cheek, mouth moving firmly against his.  His lips were tingling from the force of it.  When Ignis pulled back eventually, his eyes were hooded, glazed, the green of his eyes obliterated by the dark pupils.

  They stared at each other, searching each others gaze before Ignis dove down again, claiming Noct’s mouth as his.  Noct clasped Ignis to him tighter, mashing their groins together, gasping into Ignis’ mouth on his as he felt Ignis grind down into him.

  Noct mewled softly, realising Ignis was turned on, hard in his pants, writhing against Noct desperately, steadily igniting Noct’s own arousal.

  He suspected Ignis felt his response the moment he noticed it himself if the little whine that came from him was any indication.  That and the hard thrust of his pelvis.  The kiss turned filthy, wet, messy as Ignis began to rut against him, a delighted groan sounding in Noct’s ear as he pushed up to meet each thrust down, eager for more friction.

  Ignis withdrew his mouth with a harsh gasp, “bloody hell,” he rasped in Noct’s ear, breath hot on his skin.

  Noct could only agree with that sentiment.  Euphoria burning through his veins, twinning in his blood as it pounded in his ears.

  Ignis shook his head ruefully, resting his forehead on Noct’s, his skin hot and clammy.

  “As much as I want to rip your clothes off and show you how much I love you, I want to do this right,” Noct mumbled.  “I want to take you out, properly.  On a date.”

  Ignis sat back, pulling Noct up with him, shifting and shuffling as he adjusted his pants.  His actions did little to hide the tent in his trousers.  Noct could sympathise, considering the tight state of his own dress pants.  He settled at Ignis’ side, leaning into him, smiling when Ignis looped his arm around Noct’s shoulder to keep him close.

  “You needn’t do that, Noct, I really do not need seducing,” Ignis laughed.  “I am rather a sure thing where you are concerned.”

  Noct ducked his head, hiding his smile, “yeah same, but I still want to.”

  Ignis hummed thoughtfully, “well then, who am I to argue with my King.”  His hand stroked lazy circles over Noct’s bicep, comforting in a familiar gesture.

  Noct twisted to look up at Ignis, “I’m not your king in this, Speccy.  I don’t want to force anything on you.  I want us to be equal in this…relationship.”

  “Oh Noct,” Ignis breathed out quietly.  His other hand came up to cup Noct’s cheek, “you will always be my King, I cannot separate that from who you are to me and I do not wish to.  I love every part of you.”  Ignis smiled down at him, “however, I believe I can compartmentalise if you will.  I understand what you are trying to say.  And I appreciate it.”

  “Can you promise me you’ll talk to me, tell me when you’re uncomfortable, or if I’m being dumb?” Noct asked him.

  “I do believe I am already adept at that, Noct,” Ignis chuckled, nuzzling Noct’s cheek.

  Noct rolled his eyes at that, “yeah, alright, but still, you’ll tell me if I do something you don’t want or if you want me to do something…ahhh…different.”

  Ignis raised a brow, pushing up his glasses.  “I am…unpractised at communicating my __desires__ , however, I will endeavour to make them known to you.”

  Noct pondered that for a moment.  “Well, if you can’t say it, what about writing it, like in your notebook?”

  Ignis snorted.  “Noctis Lucis Caelum, are you suggesting we keep a booty call notebook?”

  Noct burst out laughing, “well, that’s not something I ever thought I’d hear out of your mouth.”  He smothered another laugh, “but sort of, yeah, I guess I am.”

  Ignis shot him a devilish grin, “I imagine you’ll be hearing quite a few things from me that you never thought you’d hear me say…or do, for that matter.”

  Noct digested that information with a long blink.  “Ok, my brain is frying thinking about that.”

 Ignis coughed, embarrassed, “yes, well, I have had a great deal of time to think about…those sorts of things.”

  Noct snuggled close, “and I am looking forward to hearing about them all.”

 

  The first date was, to put it mildly, a disaster of epic proportions to begin with.  Noct was trying to hard to please, flustered and quiet, while Ignis himself, was unsure of what to do with his hands, wringing them under the table while the conversation stalled time after time.  Noct attempted to appear worldly as he perused the menu, failing dismally, his expression falling further and further as his eyes skimmed down.

  Vegetables with everything.

  He eventually chose something that looked like it had the least offensive mixture as Ignis sat pensively selecting his own meal.

  Choosing the wine was worse.  

  “Ugh,” Noct grunted.  “I don’t know what’s good,” he admitted after a few minutes of fruitless reading.

  Ignis sighed, plucking the wine list from his hands, “let me.”

  Noct hung his head and conceded defeat.  He’d wanted it to be perfect and he was cocking it up at every turn.  First he’d forgotten how to tie his tie, then the vest he wanted to wear hadn’t been laundered so he’d had to leave it off.  He hadn’t let his jacket hang to let the creases drop out of it and in his flurry to get ready his hair had simply been left to hang about his face as usual.  In worrying over everything, he’d been late to pick Ignis up.

  And now he looked like an imbecile while choosing something to eat and drink.  

  “Sorry,” Noct mumbled, thoroughly abashed.

  Ignis looked up sharply, “whatever for?”

  “I’m fucking up our date,” Noct grumbled at the table, toying with the cutlery as the wait staff bustled around them.

  “You are nervous,” Ignis stated quietly.  He reached over and made Noct set the knife down, taking his hand across the table.  “You needn’t be, you know.”

  “But I wanted it to be perfect.”

  “Oh Noct,” Ignis whispered, thumb stroking the back of Noct’s hand gently.  “I am with you, nothing could possibly mar my evening.”

  “Really?” Noct asked hopefully.

  “Yes, really,” Ignis drawled in his accented tone.  “Just relax, please.”

  Noct smiled shyly, Ignis’ voice always calming.  “I just wanted to impress you.”

  Ignis smirked, a little quirk of his lips, “you impress me every day, in a multitude of ways.  I told you before you need not seduce me, you did that years ago.”

  Noct flushed in the candlelight.  “Iggy, you can’t just say stuff like that.”

  “Oh, but I can and I will, I adore the blush it brings to your cheeks,” Ignis responded, lips twisting up into a broader smile.

  Noct tried to hide behind his glass of wine, choking on the mouthful as Ignis’ foot travelled up his calf, its owner shooting him a suggestive wink across the table.  Taking a breath to steel himself, Noct extended a foot beneath the safety of the table and copied Ignis’ action, pleased when Ignis bit his lip.

  Noct’s anxiety eases as they eat, he’s so busy sneaking little peeks at Ignis across from him that the hated vegetables in his dinner make their way into his mouth with nary a grimace, something that Ignis noticed but didn’t comment on.  When dessert arrives, Noct cheers mentally when Ignis giggles as Noct leaned forward and fed him some of his own, flushing prettily as he wrapped his lips around the tip of the spoon.  Noct’s mind went a little blank as he watched Ignis’ tongue swipe over his top lip, licking off the smear of cream he’d left there.  It brought to mind __other__  things, things that had him squirming in his seat.

  Ignis’ smirk when he returned the gesture told Noct that the green eyed man knew what Noct had been thinking.  He is apparently an open book to Ignis, the man sharp eyed to every gesture and expression, drinking them all in.

  As he walked Ignis back to his rooms in the citadel, just down the hall from Noct’s own, his heart rate kicked up, Ignis stiffening beside him as they approached the door.

  “Would you come in?  I have something for you,” Ignis said softly, pausing with his hand on the doorknob.

  “Ahh, yeah, ok,” Noct said, shuffling his feet, wondering what Ignis had in mind.

  There’s a part of him, south of his belt, that hopes it might be an invitation to stay.  The rest of him is decidedly nervous about the prospect.

  Ignis bit his lip again, handing him a crisp new notebook, pen clipped to the cover.

  “You wanted me to write down what I wanted if I couldn’t say it out loud, so I did,” Ignis informed him.

  Noct stared down at the notebook in his hands, then back up to Ignis, “right, so…there’s something in here you want me to read?”

  “Yes, there is.”  Ignis smiled shyly, contrasting with his bold words earlier.

  “Should I read it now?”  

  Ignis tugged at Noct’s arm, pulling him further into the apartment, then over to the plush couch in his living room.  Once seated, Ignis crossed one leg over the other, smoothing the crease in his pants.  “Yes, read it now, if you would like.”

  The hopeful lilt to Ignis’ voice almost lost in the nerves.  Noct nodded and opened it to the first page.

  He smiled as he saw Ignis’ familiar script and the now familiar salutation.

_My darling Noct_

_You wished for me to write down things that I want and am too shy or embarrassed to express verbally, so…_

_There are so many things I wish to experience with you, things I have spent many long nights and more than a few days dreaming of.  Things I blush to think about now, even knowing you wish to know what they are.  I am not one for being crass, usually, however, thoughts of you have a tendency to push me in that direction._

_My desires where you are concerned are many and varied, some of which I am not even sure I wish to indulge in, fantasies as they are.  Some fantasies are perhaps not meant to be acted upon.  The ones that are…well, I do admit to a vast amount of excitement at the prospect._

_So, Noct, I want to touch you, to kiss you, to devour you, take you apart and put you back together in the best of ways.  I wish to run my hands over your bare flesh and know that you are mine, feel your hands mapping my skin and know that I am yours.  I want my lips to follow the paths my hands have explored.  I want to suckle at your skin, leave my mark on you as you leave your own on me.  I want to hear you moan my name as I touch and kiss and lick and suck._

_I want to make love to you._

_I want you to make love to me._

_Whichever way, I do not care._

_Or both.  Both would be wonderful._

_I want to feel debauched in your arms, to let go completely and just feel.  I want to feel you heavy and hot on my tongue, filling my mouth, my throat.  I want to lap up the taste of you, savour you._

_At the risk of sounding blunt and crass, I want you to fuck me so hard I forget my own name, yours the only thing I remember._

_I want it hard and fast, or slow, soft, gentle.  I want to laugh with you, be playful with you, or sob your name.  I want my voice to be so hoarse I can hardly hear it._

_I want it all and so much more.  I want you, Noctis, every part of you.  I will willingly give you all of myself in every way you want me.  I want to use my body to express to you how much I love you.  I want you to make me filthy, make me squirm and beg for more.  I want to fill you with my release, then lick and suck you clean._

_Honestly, there is so much I wish to do with you that I simply cannot express fully my desires._

_I love you, my darling._

_Always, always yours_

_Ignis_

 Noct turned owlish eyes up to Ignis, blinking in shock, mouth dropped open as he tried to formulate words.

  Ignis blushed, averting his gaze, “too much?”

  Noct pounced, landing in Ignis’ lap, notebook dropping to the floor with a soft thud, capturing his mouth and letting his kiss say what he couldn’t manage verbally.  Ignis groaned under him, hands landing on Noct’s hips to drag their groins flush.  Noct’s brain was whirling, a riot that he had no hope of working through, not with how Ignis pushed his hips up.

  Ignis chased his mouth when Noct pulled back to catch his breath, giving Noct a petulant pout as his silent request was denied.  For now.

  “Fuck, Ignis,” Noct hissed.  “That was, without doubt, the hottest thing I have ever read.”  Ignis’ darkened eyes flicked up to meet his own, wide and trusting.  “Yes, to all of it, everything.”

  “Truly?” Ignis asked, as breathless as Noct.  He could only nod, Ignis searching his gaze intently.  “Here?  Tonight?  Now?”

  Noct nodded again, “yeah.”

  Ignis swallowed, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat, “bed?” he asked, voice gone rough, wanton.

  “Bed,” Noct answered.

  Ignis startled him when his slid his hands under Noct’s thighs and lifted them both from the couch in one swift move.  Noct wrapped his legs around Ignis’ waist, clinging on as Ignis strode purposely towards his bedroom.

 

  “Let me, please,” Ignis whispered into his ear, Noct fumbling with the buttons on his shirt at the foot of Ignis’ bed.  He dropped his hands to his sides and nodded his assent.  Ignis’ deft fingers shook a little as he slipped each button free, exposing Noct’s chest to his appreciative gaze.  “Mmm,” Ignis hummed, licking his bottom lip.  Warm hands stroked down his torso as Ignis spread the shirt open.

  Noct resisted the urge to squirm, biting his own lip as Ignis met his eyes.  Fingertips danced up his sides then over his pectorals, thumbs rubbing over his nipples making them harden and peak.

  “Oh,” Noct murmured, tilting his head back and pushing his chest into Ignis’ waiting hands.

  “Good?” Ignis mumbled as he nibbled at Noct’s jaw.

  “Really good.”

  Ignis worked at his cufflinks next, removing them and leaning back to place them on the dresser for safekeeping.

  Once the shirt slipped off his shoulders and down his arms, Ignis stepped back and took him in.

  “So beautiful,” Ignis said under his breath, tracing fiery lines over Noct’s exposed skin, lingering over long healed scars.  Noct shivered at the touch, holding back a soft moan.

  He had no hope of holding back the one that tears from his throat as Ignis dipped his head, lips closing around one nipple, his fingers teasing at the other.  As Ignis suckled, Noct brought his hands up to Ignis’ hair, tangling the soft strands between his fingers, pulling him in as he arched his chest into Ignis’ mouth.  Ignis’ teeth grazed the nub, his tongue swirling.

  “Shit,” Noct hissed.  “That feels good.  Why does that feel so good?”

  Ignis chuckled around his nipple, then sucked harder, still working his fingers diligently.  Noct looked down to see Ignis peering up at him.  The glance was heated, lustful, the warmth of it settling in Noct’s stomach.

  Ignis let the nipple go with a slick sound, giving it a quick kittenish lick, “you are sensitive.  I like that.”

  “Maybe it’s coz it’s you.”

  Ignis’ lips quirked, “hmm, I like that more.”

  Noct tugged on Ignis’ hair, urging him up, “c’mere.”

  “With pleasure.”  Ignis’ voice comes out more like a purr sending little sparks of arousal up and down his spine.  Ignis’ voice any day is like liquid sin, but that purring tone is something that should be illegal.  How he got so lucky to be loved by this man is beyond Noct to understand.

  Noct slotted their mouths together again, fumbling with the buttons on Ignis’ shirt, groaning as he finally got it open and slipped his hands inside the parted fabric.  He pulled back so he could admire what he could feel, pushing the shirt off Ignis’ shoulders.

  What he saw made him pause.

  Ignis flinched, biting his lip and averting his eyes.

  The shirt fluttered to the floor, forgotten as Noct stared.  Ignis was sculpted like a statue, he’d always known that and he knew that there would be some scars littering his frame, including the new one from his recent injury.  But he wasn’t prepared for the extent of it.

  All down his left arm, shoulder and fading as it reached his ribcage on that side were the ashy silver remnants from the Ring.  Similar to the faded scar over Ignis’ left eye.  He glanced up to see Ignis fretting.

  “Hey, don’t do that,” he soothed with a caress to Ignis’ cheek.  “You’re beautiful, Ignis.”

  Ignis made a non-committal noise, something like a grunt of pain.  He shook his head in denial.

  “You __are,__ ” Noct insisted.  He pulled Ignis’ glasses from his nose, reaching out to put them safely out of harms way.  Ignis’ regarded him cautiously with wide eyes.  “I mean it.”

  “They are unsightly,” Ignis said quietly.

  “You got them from trying to protect me, trying to save me and they don’t look bad to me.”  Ignis frowned at his words.  “Do my scars repulse you?” he asked softly.

  “No, of course not.”

  “Then why would yours turn me off?”  Noct watched him closely, seeing the way his mind whirled.  “They are part of you and I love you, all of you.”  He clasped hold of Ignis’ left hand, kissing the scorch mark around his finger, then his palm.  “You put your life on the line for me.”

  “I would do it a thousand times, over and over,” Ignis whispered.

  “I know.”  He pressed another kiss to Ignis’ palm, tracing patterns up Ignis wrist and arm, following the silvery lines.  Dipping his head, he kissed over the lines on Ignis’ chest.  Ignis hissed above him and he looked up sharply, concerned it had hurt.  “Are they painful?”

  “N…no,” Ignis blushed.  “I…no-one has ever touched them like that.”

  Noct tilted his head, “has anyone seen them?”  He was willing to bet not.  Ignis had always been private about his body, which was a crime as far as he was concerned.  It was a work of art and hard work.  He remember the discomfort that had been much in evidence when they had all worn the Assassin costumes for the festival in Lestallum.

  And that was before he’d been marked by the Ring.

  Ignis shook his head, confirming what Noct had thought.

  “I…when I was taken back to Altissia, after…after you went into the crystal, after you healed me…Gladio and Prompto wanted to tend to them, but…I didn’t want them to see.”  He looked ashamed.  “I felt guilty and selfish over what I had done and I was frightened that I had made things worse.”

  “So, you looked after them yourself.”  Noct sighed, pulling Ignis closer so he could let his lips ghost over the silver at Ignis’ shoulder.  Typical of Ignis, always looking after everyone else and dealing with his problems on his own.  “Will you let me take care of you?  Please.”  His lips and tongue left wet trails over Ignis’ skin, drawing a barely perceptible shiver from him.  He let his hands shift from Ignis’ wrist and arm, running them up and down Ignis’ chest then down over his abdominals.  His hands hesitated as he brushed the thin trail of downy hair beneath Ignis’ navel.  He peered up to see Ignis watching him, eyes dark again, hooded, lips parted as his chest rose and fell with his increased heart rate.

  Ignis’ lashes fluttered, hair flopping over his forehead as he nodded eagerly, a quiet whisper of “please.”

  Letting his hands inch lower, Noct mouthed at the expanse of Ignis’ throat, licking over the heated skin.  Noct felt light as air, like he’s floating in the sea green of Ignis’ eyes.  There’s euphoria in this, kissing Ignis’ heated skin, touching him, caressing him, loving him.

  Slipping his fingers into the waistband of Ignis’ impeccably pressed pants, he wiggled them in the downy hair again, knowing he’s just above the point where he’ll be touching Ignis’ cock.  Ignis rolled his pelvis into it, eager for more, requesting more.

  “Please,” Ignis pleaded, voice low, rough, filled with the desire that Noct can feel building between them, that in a way, had always been there.  

  “I’ll never deny you, I __can’t deny you__ ,” Noct whispered, his lips ghosting over Ignis’ collarbone, sharp and defined.  Slipping the button free, Ignis moaning softly as Noct eased the zipper down, he slid his hand in to cup at Ignis through his underwear, soft cotton outlining the hardness of Ignis’ straining erection.

  It was a heady feeling, knowing he’d done this to Ignis, that Ignis has wanted him, wanted this for so long, had denied himself the pleasure of his touch because he felt his affections, his love, wouldn’t be returned.  Noct vows to himself that Ignis will never doubt that he loves him.

  A low groan punched out of Ignis, his hips stuttering forward as Noct curled his hand around him and squeezed gently.

  “You like me touching you?”

  Ignis drew in a shaky breath, “I love you touching me.”  Noct mouthed down to a nipple, suckling at it, teasing it with his teeth.  “Please, more.”  His gasp as Noct closed around the nipple, sucking hard was sinful, wanton.

  Tucking both thumbs in the waistband of both pants and underwear, Noct eased them down over Ignis slim hips taking half a step back so he can see Ignis’ body revealed.  The sharp ‘v’ between his hips, the definition of his muscular thighs.  The hard, swollen length hanging heavy between, flushed, weeping.  Begging for attention.  Kneeling before Ignis, Noct guided each foot out fabric, tugged his socks from his feet.  He pressed kisses at Ignis’ knees, slowly working his way up, coaxing Ignis to open his legs a little so he can explore the creamy expanse of skin on his inner thighs, discovering Ignis is rather sensitive there, muscles quivering.

  Higher and higher he moved, Ignis attempting to stay still and failing, his hips shifting with every press of lips.

  Noct couldn’t hold back any longer, wrapping a hand around Ignis’ girth, his tongue laving from root to tip, circling around the head, collecting moisture and swallowing it eagerly.

  “Oh,” Ignis moaned, Noct looking up to see Ignis tip his head back, throat bobbing with his swallows.

  Ignis felt like velvet covered steel in his fist, tasted slightly bitter on his tongue and utterly perfect.  He felt the tremble of Ignis’ thighs, heard his quiet gasps and moans as he continued kissing and licking at Ignis’ cock, finally taking the head into the waiting cavern of his mouth.  Ignis whimpered, tangling his fingers in Noct’s hair, pulling it back from his face.  It meant Noct had an unobstructed view of Ignis when he looked up, locking their eyes as he sucked him into his mouth.  Noct grinned as best he could with a mouth full of cock at the expression of utter bliss painted on Ignis’ face, his own mouth dropped open, the rapid rise and fall of his chest halting as Ignis sucked in a rasping breath.

  Ignis moaned again, fingers tightening in Noct’s hair, not pushing him down, merely following the slow bobbing of Noct’s head as he took him in as far as he could.  Admittedly, it wasn’t as much as he’d like, but Ignis seemed more than pleased with what was happening.

  Ignis’ cock twitched in Noct’s mouth, a high pitched whine coming from the man in question, “fuck,” whispered low so Noct could only just hear the uncharacteristic curse.  Ignis pulled at his hair, urging him back, “please, come up here.”

  Noct lifted up from his knees, surprised with a passionate Ignis, claiming his mouth, diving his tongue into Noct’s mouth eagerly.  Long fingered hands fluttered down his torso to wrestle him out of the rest of his clothes.  The pair groaned at the first touch of bare skin, Ignis’ hand finding a very comfortable home on the globes of Noct’s ass, fingertips digging in as Ignis pulled them flush.

  Ignis nibbled at Noct’s earlobe, tugging it between his teeth, his breath hot on Noct’s skin, “that felt wonderful, love, you were taking me apart.”  Another sharp tug on his earlobe.  “I wish to reciprocate, may I?”

  Noct groaned, “you really don’t need to ask.”

  “Hmm, perhaps not,” Ignis mused softly.  He turned them around and walked Noct backwards to the bed, laying over him when Noct shuffled back onto it fully.  He let his thighs drop open to welcome Ignis in.  “Oh,” Ignis murmured as their bodies met, thrusting his pelvis down.

  Noct threw his head back, exposing his throat to Ignis’ questing mouth, groaning at the friction of their cocks rubbing together.  He mewled as Ignis’ teeth nipped at his neck, wrapping his arms around Ignis’ shoulders.

  “Fuck, Iggy, you feel so good,” Noct moaned, canting his hips up for more.

  “So do you, so much better than I ever imagined,” Ignis told him.  “What do you want, darling?”

  Noct’s mind spun, so many things racing through his brain, particularly after reading what Ignis wanted.  There was a certain line that Noct focused on, but it required a bit of a conversation.

  “There was something you wanted, and now I can’t stop thinking about it,” Noct murmured quietly.  Ignis nodded his encouragement.  “I…um, I’m clean, right?  And I want to feel you, properly, I mean.”

  Ignis leaned back, planting his hands beside Noct’s head so he could peer down at him, his brain obviously catching on to what Noct was saying.  “I am clean too, I haven’t ever been without protection…before.”

  “So, can we…I mean, you wanted to, um, clean me, after…” he trailed off, not quite able to voice it.

  Ignis growled low in his throat, “oh, yes!”

  Noct let out a nervous giggle at Ignis’ eager response.  “Ok, awesome.”  Then he wanted to face palm himself for sounding like a fucking dork.  Thankfully, Ignis seemed to find it endearing, eyes soft as he gazed at Noct, dopey smile on his face.  Lust addled and happy was a really good look on Ignis.

  Then Ignis was averting his eyes, “I purchased some, ahem, lubricant, just in case.”

  Noct giggled again, “just in case, huh?”

  Ignis dipped his head down, sharp teeth sinking into the juncture between Noct’s neck and shoulder, no doubt leaving a mark, “hush.”

  He couldn’t resist teasing Ignis a little more, “and I suppose you got condoms too, right?  Just in case?”

  Ignis snorted against his neck, “of course.”  He leaned back, a slightly devilish look on his face.  “And though we won’t need them tonight, there may be other times they come in handy, when clean up is not possible.”

  Noct snickered, “so, like the odd quickie in my office when no-one’s around, then.”

  Ignis smirked, “or other places where it wouldn’t do to leave a mess.”

  Noct groaned loudly at that, brain whirling at the possibilities.  “Damn, Baby.”

  Ignis pecked him on the cheek, slipping away out of Noct’s grasp for a moment, presenting Noct with the sight of his back, the broad shoulders, the dip to his slim waist, his perfect ass.  Gods, that ass.  Noct couldn’t tear his eyes away, taking in the play of muscles under his skin, the dimples just above his ass, the firm curve of it.  He shuffled back up the bed to rest his head on the pillows, sweeping his eyes up and down Ignis’ svelte form.  Ignis turned back, catching him in his appreciation, his hand curled around his cock, stroking languidly as Ignis flushed at the attention.  He beckoned Ignis close again, crooking his finger and shooting him a little smile.

  Ignis bit his lip, crawling back to him and dropping the unopened bottle he’d grabbed beside Noct, settling between parted thighs to lean up and steal another kiss.

  “You are sure about this, I am quite content to switch places,” Ignis said softly, his hand cupping Noct’s cheek, thumb rubbing over the bone.

  “Mhmm, really sure, we can try that next time,” Noct nodded.  “Now, c’mere and make love to me.”

  Ignis’ eyes darkened, his breath hitching, “oh, Noct, I love you so.”

  Noct beamed up at his lover, boyfriend, oldest, most cherished friend, “I love you too.”

  Their next kiss was incredibly sweet, their lips moving in concert as Ignis kept his hand to Noct’s face.  It overwhelmed him more than any other kiss thus far, Ignis pouring everything into it.  When Ignis pulled back, Noct felt dizzy with desire and love for this man.  Ignis moved down to kiss his clavicles, down his sternum, pausing to suck at each nipple with teasing little licks.  Noct arched up, Ignis fingers dancing down his sides to his hips where he stroked over the bones.  Every touch of Ignis, every kiss, felt so erotic, so loving.

  Ignis slid lower, dragging his body over Noct as his lips travelled down his stomach, his tongue flicking out to lick over the dips and valleys of his abdominals.  Ignis looked up as he reached Noct’s groin, peering through the hair falling into his eyes, parting his lips to lick up the shaft, hands caressing the sensitive skin of his inner thighs, close to where Noct wanted them, but flitting away before he actually touched, prolonging the anticipation.

  When Ignis finally did touch him, it wasn’t to grasp, it was a light glide of his fingers up the length, letting the tips of his fingers ghost around the head and Noct found himself moaning wantonly, writhing as Ignis teased him.  His other hand came up from his inner thigh to do the same with his balls, massaging them gently, testing their weight.

  Noct’s cock jumped when Ignis’ finger glided lower, over his perineum, then lower still to tease around his ring.  Noct spread his thighs further, complicit invitation for Ignis to do what he wished.  Noct felt no embarrassment, no shame, at presenting himself this way, surprised at just how comfortable he was for Ignis to see him like this, open, exposed.

  The hand teasing his cock vanished, a snap of a bottle cap opening and then Noct felt a warm wetness circling his hole.  

  “I will be careful, love,” Ignis murmured against Noct’s knee.

  “I know you will.”  He inhaled sharply when Ignis pressed gently, not quite breaching the ring, not yet.  Ignis massaged at it, letting Noct relax into the touch, then slowly pushing until the tip of his finger was inside, keeping his eyes on Noct’s the whole time.  “More, Ignis,” Noct whispered, his voice stolen as Ignis fluttered his lashes at him.

  Ignis went so slowly there was hardly any burn, soon fading completely as pleasure took its place.  It felt amazing and it wasn’t long before he was rocking down on Ignis’ finger, begging for more.  A second slick finger prodded at his entrance, then Ignis slid his finger out to add two.  The burn was more prevalent this time, but again, Ignis’ pace and the soothing way he kissed at Noct’s knee and thigh had him relaxing, the clench he had on the fingers inside easing as he tilted his head back and sighed, long and deep.  

  “Another?” Ignis asked, his voice dropping an octave or two, scissoring the ones inside him to increase the stretch.  He was about to answer when Ignis crooked his fingers and brushed over his prostate.

  Noct groaned, arching his back off the bed, hips working furiously for more of _that_.

  Ignis breathed out a soft “ahh,” at the reaction, then repeated it.  Noct yelped when he felt Ignis lick up his length again, the twin sensations threatening to send him over the edge far too quickly for his liking.

  “Ignis, please,” he begged, rasping the words out.

  Ignis hummed against his cock, the vibrations doing nothing to stave off his pent up orgasm.  “Let go, I want you to enjoy this as much as possible, love.”

  “Gods, you’re gonna turn me into a puddle,” Noct laughed breathlessly.

  Ignis hummed again, making his cock twitch and his ass clench around Ignis’ deft fingers, “that is somewhat the idea, Noct,” Ignis drawled, drawing out the ‘t’ of his name.

  Wet, warm lips sealed themselves around the head of his cock, sucking as another finger eased in beside the others.  Noct couldn’t keep still, couldn’t keep the sounds spilling from his mouth as his stomach tightened and coiled.  Ignis sucked him down and Noct shouted Ignis’ name, spilling into the wet heat of his mouth.  He flopped back, panting, vision white, blood roaring in his ears.

  Ignis licked at him, gentle and careful, cleaning him of every drop, fingers slowing their ministrations as Noct came back down.

  “Fuck, Ignis!”

  Ignis was smirking at him like the cat that got the cream, licking his lips seductively when Noct managed to pry his eyes open.  He felt lax, loose, allowing Ignis’ fingers to slide back and forth, thankful Ignis was avoiding his prostate for a moment.

  “I adore the sounds you make.”

  Noct would have blushed if he weren’t already most likely crimson.

  “Ignis,” Noct tried to scold, but it was a pathetic attempt really.  Ignis only smiled at him indulgently.

  Ignis’ fingers stared moving again, twisting and scissoring inside him, coaxing the fire in Noct’s blood to ignite again, his cock valiantly trying to rise again.

  “Are you ready for me?” Ignis asked, his tone giving away his own urgency.

  “Yeah,” Noct muttered.  “I want you.”

  Ignis mewled at that, reaching out with his free hand to wrangle to cap of the bottle open and coat himself.  Noct watched greedily, Ignis stroking himself with the lubricant, tipping his head back with a growl.  One day he was going to ask Ignis if he could watch him jerk himself off, he looked beautiful with his pink cheeks and swollen lips.

  As Ignis withdrew his fingers, Noct gasped at how empty he felt, clenching around nothing.  The sensation didn’t last long as Ignis shuffled closer, hiking Noct’s thighs around his waist and lining up.  The slick tip of Ignis’ cock caught on his rim, Noct hissing and rocking his hips to encourage Ignis in.  Ignis halted, breathing heavily when the head of his cock popped through the ring of muscle.

  Hands planted beside Noct’s head, dipping his own between his shoulders, Ignis exhaled slowly, “bloody hell, you feel divine already, my love.”

  “You feel huge,” Noct groaned.

  “Too much, I can…” Ignis fretted, shifting his hips.

  Noct wrapped his thighs around Ignis’ hips, holding him in place, “don’t you dare, you feel perfect.”  Canting his pelvis up, he drew Ignis in, both of them groaning as Ignis slid in further.  And then Ignis kept pushing, feeding his whole length in until he was encased to the hilt.  

  Noct clenched around him, rocking a little to ease the stretch, Ignis gritting his teeth.

  “You are so tight, darling,” Ignis growled into Noct’s ear, his breath coming in short pants.  He pulled back a little, then thrust back in experimentally, groaning again as Noct clung to him.  “You are going to unman me.”

  Noct’s cock stirred between their stomachs, rousing and filling out again.  The way he felt so full, so fulfilled with Ignis inside him, he knew he wouldn’t be taking too long to reach release again.  And now he was desperate to feel Ignis spill inside him, coat his walls.  He wanted to hear Ignis in the midst of orgasm.

  Arms around Ignis’ neck, hugging him close, “fill me up, make me yours, Ignis.”

  Ignis moaned softly, then thrust again.  When he pulled back so he was just held by the tip, he thrust back in hard, and Noct saw stars.

  “Gods, yes, like that,” he groaned into Ignis’ ear, pressing kisses to his sharp jawline.  

  Ignis shifted for better purchase, gripping Noct just as tight as Noct was clinging to him, shoving forward harder, more forcefully, punching sharp cries from Noct’s throat, until he adjusted the angle as was pounding Noct’s prostate head on.

  Noct shouted, cried out, moaning Ignis’ name, a litany, a prayer and Ignis responded by increasing his pace, long deep thrusts, punctuating them with the occasional grind of his pelvis when he was fully sheathed.  Noct lost all sense of anything but Ignis, the sound of the skin meeting, the sound of Ignis’ rising voice, harsher and hoarser by the minute, Noct’s name repeated with each thrust.

  Noct scratched his nails down Ignis’ back, rising to meet him, mouthing at Ignis desperately, sharing breath with him, feeling himself approaching the edge again.

  Ignis’ movements became furious, Noct clenching, ass fluttering around the swelling length inside him.

  “Noct, Noct,” Ignis mewled, his thrust becoming erratic.

  “Harder, Baby, there, yes,” Noct babbled.  He arched up, stiffening, whole body tensing as he came all over his stomach, Ignis grunting as he tightened like a vice around him, euphoria clouding his senses.  A few thrusts later and Ignis stilled for a moment, sounding wrecked as he called Noct’s name.  Noct felt the warmth flooding him, heard the deep satisfied sigh as Ignis rocked his hips weakly, riding it out.

  Then his face was peppered with kisses, Ignis laying over him fully, letting Noct feel the comforting weight of him.  Noct didn’t let him go when Ignis made to move, pull out.  He just wanted to feel him like this a bit longer, making a weak sound of protest.  Ignis slumped back down, nuzzling their sweaty cheeks together, murmuring praise.

  He felt the dribble of Ignis’ come seeping out of him as Ignis slid out.  His knees were pushed up gently as Ignis re-situated himself, eyeing Noct’s twitching hole hungrily.  Noct lifted his hips invitingly, giving Ignis a nod.

  Ignis dove in like a starving man, lapping at him, licking, swirling his tongue.  Noct, overstimulated, too fuzzy from two orgasms so close together, couldn’t even speak.  Once Ignis seemed satisfied with his cleaning, he curled up at Noct’s side, pulling him close, pressing kisses into his hair.

  Noct tilted his head up, “that was…amazing.”

  “Mmm,” Ignis hummed in agreement.  “Far better than I ever imagined.”  Long fingers wove into his damp hair, scratching at his scalp.  “I love you.”

  “I love you too, always, Ignis.”

  Limp and lax in Ignis’ embrace, Noct lazily mouthed at his shoulder, too sleepy to contemplate even moving.  Ignis reached out with his free hand, tugging the covers up over them and tucking it around Noct so they were both snug and warm.  Noct thought at that moment that he couldn’t possibly feel any better than he did, safe, loved, in Ignis’ arms.  He belonged there.

  

  A year after their first night together, Noct delivered a well worn notebook into Ignis’ hands, giving him a soft smile.  Ignis took it, quizzical smile on his face.  It had been a while since they had utilised it, both becoming comfortable with verbalising what they wanted.  That and the fact that they were both very well versed in each other’s desires and predilections had made the need for the notebook non-existent.

  Ignis’ eyes widened as he read the entry Noct had made.

  _My beautiful Ignis,_

_You are the air I breathe, you’re the stars and the moon and the sun and the sky.  I love you more than I can express, I try, but I fail because there are simply no words that can come close._

_But there is a way that I can show you._

_I wanted to do this in this way because it was a notebook like this one that opened my eyes to the wonder that is you.  I always knew you were special, but reading your words, discovering who you were beneath was life changing._

_Ignis, would you do me the honour of marrying me, becoming my husband, being by my side forever?_

_Yours always_

_Noctis_

  When Ignis raised wide green eyes to Noct, there were tears threatening to spill down his cheeks, Noct lowering to one knee before him, hand outstretched, small velvet box held in his palm.

  When Noct heard the whispered word he’d been waiting for, he stood, slipping the elegant black band onto Ignis’ finger.

  Curling his hands in Ignis’ hair, he whispered in Ignis’ ear, “I love you.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> So, here it is. I think this is finished, but like anything I write I might just find I like it too much to leave it alone, though this felt like a good place to finish up.  
> I hope everyone enjoys it, I know I loved writing it, especially Ignis' notebook entries.  
> Thank you for reading and commenting and kudos-ing.  
> <3  
>   
> One of the pics that inspired the whole thing


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